I read a lot. Too much sometimes. I’ve spent the last week with my nose in four (yes, four) different baby sleep books.

Baby J is 3.5 months old and. She wakes up 45 minutes into her naps.

It wasn’t always this way. She used to nap for an hour and a half several times a day.

Where did I go wrong?

Too much sleep? Too little sleep? Hungry? Is my supply dropping off? Too much activity? Too little activity? Am I holding her too much? Am I not holding her long enough? Is her wind down nap routine not sufficient? Is she tired of her swaddle? Should I have one arm in and one arm out? Both arms out? Ditch the swaddle completely? Or, should I just make the swaddle a little bit tighter? Is she addicted to her pacifier? Would she be more comfortable on her side?

I made myself eggs & toast this morning for breakfast.

Just before I sat down to eat, I opened the microwave.

There sat a cold bowl of instant oatmeal that I made for breakfast thirty minutes before.

I accidentally made breakfast twice.

I laughed at myself and did the only rational thing left to do.

I ate them both.

I’m calling off this day.

No more sleep books.

No more theories.

Forget the shush-pat method. Forget the P.U./P.D method. Forget C.I.O. Forget control crying. Forget attempting to dissect the mantra cries from the real cries.

I’m obviously overthinking it.

We are going back to the pacifier, back to the one arm in the swaddle and one arm out, back to the old nap routine and that’s that.

When she wakes up 45 minutes into her nap (and I’m certain she will), I’m going to hold her and give her the pacifier and put her back to sleep.

That’s wrong (according to my books) but it was working good enough.

I’m declaring today a sabbath of sorts. A personal day.

I’m going to quilt, watch four episodes of The Good Wife and eat popcorn.

Hopefully, tomorrow, I’ll have the presence of mind to make just one breakfast!

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